What to read this Halloween? Try this twisted tale.

Just in time for Halloween! A new book "From the twisted mind of S.L. Carpenter"

Playing doctor has never been so fun…

Mary’s nights are empty and cold, especially when that last battery dies. She yearns for the warmth and fulfillment only a living partner can provide, but is failing dismally in the dating arena. She’s a Medical Examiner with an advanced degree in sheer brilliance, but she can’t find the right guy with the right equipment. They all have something to offer, but none of her dates seems to posses the complete package. Together with her bestie, Inga the Scandinavian little person, Mary devises a plan, using her genius, the magic of electricity, and the choicest morsels from her evening “buffet” at the morgue.

Gruesome? To some, perhaps. But for Mary it’s a chance to achieve her lifetime dream and create something unique and living, instead of endlessly cataloging death.  Long shot or not, Mary knows she has to try. Because where there’s a willy, there’s a way…

Excerpt:

Mary finished her last autopsy on a man who had a massive heart attack during sex with a prostitute. The handcuff marks were still on his wrists because they couldn’t find the key immediately, and the look on his face—his lips puckered and his eyes crossed—made her snicker.

“Look Inga? Remind you of anyone?”

Inga stood on her tiptoes and smiled. “Yeah, looks like Professor Ryan when he caught me going down on his wife on that big wooden desk in his office.”

Mary’s days tended to run together into a blur. She had never gone for the standard three kids, a house and a wealthy husband kind of life everyone envisioned for her. Instead she knew she was a borderline workaholic with little time for anything normal in the way of a social life.

As she sat in the cafeteria, sipping on her fresh cup of espresso, she took a long, deep cleansing breath. Inga had left already because she had a date with a pair of nymphomaniac Vietnamese lesbians. The cases were pretty much wrapped up, and Mary figured another hour or two and she could leave. In the quiet, she started to daydream.

Perhaps she should call Peter back. See if he’d be up for a date. She had left him asleep with a bag of frozen peas on his balls. He had a shiny glaze on his lips from eating her out, and was snoring from exhaustion.

Maybe he could be a steady fuck buddy. He had great equipment and sure knew how to use it. She wondered what it would be like to be in a somewhat normal relationship.

She reflected on all the different men and sexual partners she had been with in the past, and went back even further in her memories. She’d never been the most popular girl in school. Most women geniuses tended to be shunned and even though she had the looks and social skills, dealing with the arrogant divas in college fraternities wasn’t her bag. She tended to be drawn to the lab rats and nerdy guys who understood intelligent thoughts instead of football scores. The ones who boasted about the notches on their headboards from all the girls they gave drugs and alcohol to so they could fuck them then brag how good they were.

A few times Mary had fallen into relationships but mostly she wound up in disasters.

Brad had been the guy every girl wanted to be with. He played football, was boyishly handsome, popular and—rumor had it—was any young girls dream in the back seat of a car. When she was in her first year of college he was a junior, and scouts were already looking at him for the pros.

Mary fell under his spell in class when she sat next to him. She let him cheat off her papers because that smile made her heart melt and her panties wet. She wasn’t the type to go for the fantasy guys. In fact she hadn’t gone for any guys up to that point.

Being a virgin in college was almost as much of a sin as being the college slut. The line between the two wasn’t wide at all. Girls needed to be wholesome and pure but know about sex and giving blowjobs and maybe some anal on a special occasion.

But most guys steered away from the girls known to be walking nymphomaniacs. The ones who usually spread diseases when they walked past a guy and had scabies and crotch lice leaping off their pussies. It was a known fact that a dude would have to be covered in a full body condom and have a major dose of Lysol over his jewels before entering the hazardous waste dump.

Mary tried her best to walk that thin line.

Brad took her virginity as a bet in college. He posted nude photos of her on the Internet after slipping her a roofie and fucking her when she passed out on a set of bunk beds in his dorm room. The images of her with a Barbie doll in her ass were the worst, but he had the softest hands, perfectly sized to hold her, and he took care of them because he was a tight end.

However, she got some form of revenge a couple of years later. Brad came out as gay and was gang-banged by an opposing team after losing a bet. Now he’s a wide receiver.

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Author Bio

S.L. Carpenter is a lifelong Californian with a passion for creating tales that bypass strange and go straight to warped with the occasional side trip to twisted. Funny, outrageous and always hot, his stories have attracted readers for over a decade and the thirty or so books currently available with his name on the cover are a testament to his continuing popularity. Besides spending time with his family, he enjoys graphic design, and is the artist responsible for more eBook covers than anyone can count, many of them award winners. Recently he co-founded his own company, P and N Graphics, which provides art for writers and all those who love the literary world. He describes himself as an ordinary guy, but his readers know better.